Sunday, November 11, 2012
Relationship Problems
Question: How should we construct a good relationship with the people around us?
Answer:
There are many kinds of relationship, such as teacher and students, parents and children, senior and junior, employer and employees and so on. Friendship is a considerably important relationship to us. Nobody could live alone from any friends. Hence, we can never run away from relationship problems. When there are people, there is a relationship. Just because of the problems we face in relationship, we could grow and overcome problems, which in the end could build up our character and personality. We can never be too withdrawn from people, or we will slowly become a self-centred person.
Everyone has his/her own way of living, and there is no doubt to that. However, constructing friendship is the best way to deal with people on variance. It is friendship that inspires us of each other’s differences. This is where we lift ourselves to a whole new level according to a different exposure. Friendship allows us to create more values together, making the society a better place. Hence, having good friends is like a boost to your engine. We’re always encouraging one another to keep walking forward with strength.
The Gosho teaches that, no matter how much we hope to be an honest and wise person, we will become a bad person when we’re influenced by them. This depicts that the influence of friendship is important. In other words, you could be meeting a friend occasionally, but for some reason, you two could slowly grow towards a positive way and becoming each other’s good friends.
Whether to be a good or a bad friend, it all lies beneath our own character and personality. The very first step of constructing a healthy friendship, is respect and trust in one another. Bad friends are the ones who go against the society or the law, the ones who bring others sufferings. On the other hand, good friends are the ones who encourage and give hopes to the people around them.
Friendship ignites naturally most of the times. But sometimes it is something that we must fight for, and sometimes it begins from hate or affection. No matter what, friendship is a valuable treasure. Please do not judge that people will always be that way. That is an arrogant attitude. A person is never simple. There is bad and good in a person. Even if we were betrayed, we must remind ourselves not to do the same. We must be the ones to keep our words, to be there to encourage our friends when they’re in pain.
When you grow up, it won’t be as easy as before to build up a true friendship. Hence, grab such golden opportunities at your age. Friends from your schools are like comrades of a same stage. No matter how things or people change, those who could persist on their own path will be the true victors. It is such an attitude that lets us construct a strong and truthful friendship.
Friendship is a fundament for mankind. Regardless of peace or society, friendship is the key that enriches and inspires of their growth. Making friends with the people around us is the foundation of constructing a peaceful society.
Adapted from “Discussion of Youth – Part 1”
Labels: r. Q and A Station
Q&A with Ikeda Sensei 2
Chapter 2 Carrying
dreams
Q9, what was your dream when you were a kid?
A: I had
2 dreams when I was a kid. The first one was to live a quiet life and writing a
novel that I can pass on to the next generations. The second dream was to let
the charming cherry blossom to bloom and make the people feel happy.
Q10, what should we do
now in order to contribute to the world in the future?
A: Youngsters should learn foreign
languages. To have a heart that walks towards peace together is more important
than any other things. To be able to do that, we need to communicate with
others. There are lots of people learning Japanese out there, we must learn
their languages as well. It is important to be able to communicate directly to
foreigners. This is the key point that will allow you to contribute to the
society.
Q11, I don’t think that I
have a “mission”.
A: You’re all still very young. To mark
a conclusion out of the 10 years you’ve lived through is an early act. Even if
you don’t think you have a mission, I do not think so. I believe and respect
all of you. I believe there must be a mission that belongs only to you.
Q12, What is the purpose of mankind to live on Earth?
A: I
like to ask “why” too. “Why must we study?” “Why must we live in hardship?”
These questions are important as they will lead to our future ambitions. If we
only think for our own benefit, then our life would be wasted. Life as such is
lonely. “For mankind”, “for our parents”, “for the society”, “for justice”, “for
peace” – thoughts as such will allow you to reach your dreams, becoming a true
noble person in the future.
Q13, what do you think of
war?
A: There is nothing more devastating
than war. We must never let war cause us more pain. My eldest brother was sent
to the battlefield in China. I could never forget that time when he returned,
he fiercely yelled “It was our country’s fault! They’re being cruel! I pity the
people in China.” In the end, my brother died in war in Myanmar. My mother was
devastated when she found out about this. We must tell the truth if we do not
wish for war to repeat.
Q14, what did Mr. Makiguchi and Mr. Toda think of war?
A: Mr.
Makiguchi and Mr. Toda was a very strict person. They both commented that, “War
brings misfortune to the people; education brings happiness. War destruct life,
but education gives life. War separates people, but education binds them
together. War deprived the future of youngsters, but education opens up doors
of opportunities for them. Thus, we must construct an indestructible citadel of
humanistic education! Through the strings of education, we bind youngsters from
around the world together. Only till then can war be wiped away. Only the
victory of education could bring an everlasting victory to the people!”
Q15, what is so fascinating about reading?
A: How much of “fun” you could
experience from reading actually determines the depth of your life. Reading a
good book is like meeting a great teacher. Reading is our “human right”, where
other animals do not possess. We only live once, but when we read, we go
through all sorts of life and stories of people. In fact, we can even have a
dialogue with the people who are hundreds and thousands of years away from us.
Q16, I don’t like to read!
A: If we were to talk about the reasons
of having no interest in reading, the list could go on for days. We could say
that it is the teachers’ responsibility, or our parents’, but no matter how “great”
such reasons are, it doesn’t make us any better. We won’t become a better
person for having a “great” reason for not reading. In fact, we shall train
ourselves to have an attitude of never running away from things. Give yourself
a try and see how it works. Habit is something we can build up by ourselves,
and those who have a habit to learn could do almost anything.
Q17, I’m too afraid to
tell anyone that I was bullied!
A: It is
never a shame to look for others to talk about your problem. Don’t worry,
because you’re not the one who did something wrong. It is the one who bullied
you that’s guilty.
Q18, I don’t like to be criticized!
A: To be
criticized, is an inevitable process of you becoming a noble person. We might not
like to hear truthful words at times. But it doesn’t do anyone good if both the
parties end up being unhappy from this.
Shared
by,
Rainbow.
Translated
by,
Happy.
Labels: r. Q and A Station
Sunday, October 14, 2012
Improving my studies
Question: I don’t have a good academic result and it
bothers me a lot. What should I do to improve my results?
Answer:
First of all I’m not a teacher, therefore I could only
provide you a few basic suggestions. Please consult your teachers for some
specific questions.
Students of primary or secondary school, even the ones
from university would also like to know
the answer of your question! However, there seems not to be a universal method
or solution. There’s no other way than giving your continuous effort in it!
Some of you may think that you’re not born to be smart,
but human beings are not born with too much variation from one another. As an
educator, Mr. Toda once said that there’s not much variation between everyone’s
brains. An English philosopher, William Hamilton once quoted, “Genius, is the outcome of effort.”
Speaking of effort, baseball game is a great example to
explain. In the game, regardless of how great the batter is, he/she must
constantly practice the very basic moves, which is to hit the baseballs. As for
the catcher, he/she would need to practice catching the ball over and over
again in order to be good at it.
To me, studying works the same. It may seem boring to
study, to do revisions or to copy notes. But can the players from the baseball
team stop their practice just because they had to go through boring practices?
Even the greatest batter or catcher could fall if he/she never practices
sincerely.
Therefore, our daily studies and revisions are important
in order for us to excel in our studies. Pay attention in class, write down
notes that help you understand facts, have revisions and exercises. I guess
it’s not wrong to say that everything depends on the actions mentioned here.
The key that determines victory or failure will then be our perseverance.
Other than that, we could also look into the ways we
study. For example, which kind of reference books to study, or where to carry
out revisions? The methods vary from one another. But the only thing we can
conclude, is that we must look for the ways that suit us the most. There are
always pros and cons from the methods of studying. Sometimes we might want to
learn from our friends, but in the end, we still have to discover the way that
works for us.
In my opinion, most of us who struggle in academic have
not made ourselves a firm foundation. Therefore, why don’t we start to practice
on the basics? We should even start revising the subjects thoroughly from
standard 1 until now. This way, we could make sure that we’ve understood what
we’ve learned previously before entering a more difficult level. When you come
across to problems we don’t understand, please do not hesitate to ask your
friends or teachers.
Calm down a study step by step. I’m sure you can make it!
Labels: r. Q and A Station
A True Friendship
Question: My friends were very close to me, but they
changed. I had no idea what a true friendship is about.
Answer:
What’s worth praising, is that you’d immediately have
some time to self-reflect upon such issue. I believe you must be a kind and
caring person!
Therefore, I hope that you would carry on with your
confidence and strive vigorously on your own path. If you discover a little more
of yourself that you need to change, please do so. Otherwise, please continue
on your journey as you are.
It is usual to have your physical and psychological state
to have a rapid growth at your age. In other words, your mindset, your
perception changes as well.
It is common to see your close friends making friends
with different kind of people. After all, this is a stage of youth where your
emotion changes drastically. At times, you would get mad or misled, and you
might even start to dislike your friends under the influence of some rumour.
Under such drastic growth, it might not always be your
fault nor your friend’s when something is going on. I think that this is the
very proof of you becoming an adult.
Sometimes, people do change. You’re changing each year,
so do your friends and your surroundings. Therefore, it is usual for people to
change. Could you recall yourself being friends with the same group of people
when you were in kindergarten, primary school, or even high school?
I bet you’d come across to situations like this even more
in the future! You’d feel bad of losing friends, but that’s what make
friendship valuable.
When you’re making friends with different kind of people
at your age, you’re actually helping each other to grow as you learn from one
another. Being with different people of various characters, you could learn to
be a better person yourself. But of course it would be marvelous if you’re able
to maintain a friendship with certain people for over ten years. However at the
perception of character building, you might just be short of certain elements.
Constantly, we lose some friends and then, making new
ones. That’s the way to discover the most truthful friendship. Therefore, the
sorrow you feel for now, would then become a valuable experience of yours. Only
through this way, could you understand and find your way to a truthful
friendship. If we never experienced lost, we might never know what a true
friendship is about. You’re right at the stage where you experience what a true
friendship really is.
Nevertheless, if you adhere yourself to your close
friends at all times, they might just get annoyed. Everyone needs time and
space for themselves, hence, we must learn to respect each other. To respect
our friend as a person with a distinctive personality, this is the way we
construct a strong friendship.
A true friendship is not merely two person being
together. True friendship is about expressing your own personality to
communicate and grow together. In other words, we should be achieving more when
we’re with our friends. Having an equation like 1+1=3, or even 4.
Labels: r. Q and A Station
Wednesday, September 26, 2012
Love (2)
Question: I think I like a boy next class. Lots of my friends have boyfriends and girlfriends, I wish to have a boyfriend too.
Answer:
According to some surveys, the earliest age to feel an affection for someone could be at the age of kindergarten. Must we have a relationship every time we like someone? Must I catch up just because my classmates are in a relationship? Is it alright for teenagers to be in a relationship? I could still recall teachers reminding us that students aren’t matured enough and should focus on their academic. Nevertheless, teenagers always tend to be influenced by dramas or their own emotion. Many teenagers tend to rush themselves into a relationship.
I remember there was once a little girl who came crying to me, her name was Sharpay. She said that “I misunderstood my boyfriend. He got mad and wanted to break up with me. I feel so depressed. I don’t want to go to school anymore!” She told me that “I broke up with my previous boyfriend not because I didn’t like him, but because we were just pushed together by our friends. But this time, it’s different. This boyfriend is really really good…” Sharpay is a kind girl. She would rather getting hurt than hurting any other people. From what we see here, there could be several possible problems: Being with an opposite gender for too long, not knowing how to break up? What if he asked to have sexual activity with me? How should I refuse?
“Love” must be learned, but what does a matured love consist of? In general, we need “respect”, “care”, and “responsibility”. If we do not have what we mentioned earlier, then it is not a matured love. Nowadays, we could always hear news of teenagers getting pregnant or sexually harassed by friends known from the internet.
During the adolescence stage, we should train ourselves to have the skills to manage relationship. These include the ability to self-observe, to decide, to solve, to protect ourselves, and to avoid causing any trouble. The following explanation may aid you:
1, self-observation
My current emotion is _______, and the cause of such emotion is _______. My current thought is _______, and it could lead to a result of ______.
2, the ability to decide
On our rational or irrational thoughts, are we able to make a decision rationally?
3, the ability to solve problems
What should we do when we “like” someone? List out whatever you could do and look for a rational method, then predict the outcome of such action.
A famous author Xi MuRong once mentioned, “If we had to stay away from someone whom we fall in love with someone when we’re young, we should tell them goodbye with a thankful heart. If we could do that, our youth will have no regrets. It’s just like the moon hanging quietly above the hill.” To learn how to “love” and “respect” the opposite gender is an important lesson on our journey of growth.
Mr. Ikeda written in his book, “Discussing your future with your parents and seniors isn’t an old method. From this, we could get enlightened. It could be the most inspiring compass needle.” We must learn to accept opinions from our parents and seniors. After all, they’ve been through situations like this and could give you a wider view on what’s happening. No matter what problem troubles you, please remember to discuss it with someone.
Labels: r. Q and A Station
English Materials
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